About 6 months before I turned 30, I started making drastic changes to my life.
I had an idea of what I wanted for my life and I was NOT on the path to make that idea a reality.
I owned a house with my boyfriend of almost 5 years. We had two adorable puppies. And we sat on the couch every night watching TV after working all day.
This is the dream for a lot of people. This was not my dream. I was unhappy.
My decision to leave this life behind was a very, very hard one. I didn’t want to hurt someone who invested almost 5 years into this life, as well. I didn’t want to leave my puppies. I didn’t want to change what, according to all accounts, was a good life.
But things needed to change. I couldn’t keep going on knowing and feeling unhappiness. I needed to start moving toward the life that I wanted since I was a kid. I knew what I wanted my 30’s to look like, my life didn’t look like that yet, and the only person who could give me what I wanted from my 30’s was me.
I ended my relationship. I packed up the Kia Rio, settled my legal business, said good-bye to my sweet pups, and drove to Denver, Colorado.
That was January 11, 2018. Between then and now, I can tell you that so much has changed!
It is January 19, 2019, now. In the last year, I left my full-time job. I started this blog, a Youtube channel, and really focused on my goals. Travel has become a big part of my life. I went to my dream destination, Japan. I have explored Colorado. I went on an Austin food tour. Las Vegas has taken my money twice. I spent my Halloween with Mickey Mouse in Orlando.
And I haven’t stopped traveling yet. Next month, I travel solo (yes, by myself) to NORTHERN ITALY. I’ll be in Germany in March and Japan again in May. I’m a freaking world traveler.
I’m not going to lie to you and tell you this was all easy.
- I’ve spent most of my savings, which is scary as heck for me. I have always been afraid of being broke.
- Mentally, it was really hard to face some of the changes I needed to make in order for me to be happy. I was happy, in general, but there were times when I got discouraged, nervous, anxious, worried, tired, and stressed, among other emotional struggles.
- Outside of Max (my boyfriend), I had no physical support system. Everything I had to do, I had to do myself, including dealing with my mental health. Max is the absolute best and he is kind, generous, loving, but there were a few things I needed friends for.
These reasons, among others, made it very hard at times to keep living this dream.
That’s the thing about dreams, though. If you don’t go after them, they stay dreams. They never become your successes. You have to redefine your dreams as goals and work toward them, even if it is hard and because it is hard. Overcoming the hard parts are what grows us.
“A diamond doesn’t start out polished and shining. It once was nothing special, but with enough pressure and time, becomes spectacular. ”
This has most certainly been a whirlwind year so far, but I hope this inspires those unhappy with their lives to make a change. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to chase your dreams without the weight of other’s expectations of you, and you deserve to live the life you want.
I’m not saying it will be easy, but I am saying it will be worth it. I’ve grown so much and became more comfortable with myself. I learned what I want and how to express that. I understand that the life I love isn’t everyone’s best life, but I do know that everyone should have his or her best life, whatever that life means. And that even though change is hard, you can do it.